i just figured out the perfect murder
kill someone and bury them in their own garden
that way if the police find them they’ll think it was a suicide
#welp looks like the victim committed suicide and promptly buried themselves in their garden #how considerate of them
i told leonardo dicaprio a joke about the oscars
he didn’t get it
- Coffee: Come on, have one more cup. Let me thin your blood.
- Me: I think you replaced my blood like three cups ago.